wow this made me feel so incredibly seen and i’m so glad i stumbled upon this!! i’ve been struggling with the anxiety and emet cycle for a while now and it feels so isolating and it is so nice to be reminded that our suffering is never unique! we are never alone in it!! thank you for writing this <3
Thank you so much for reading and commenting! Seeing so many people relate makes me feel all fuzzy lol. Even though I knew logically that I couldn’t be the only one who felt this way, I felt like I was until I wrote this. I wish you luck in your journey, we all deserve to love food!
Mary! Thank you for articulating your tough experience so intricately for us. You’re a beautiful person for this and I truly empathised with every word. Food is such a core part of life and relationships and I never realised its depth until reading this piece of yours!! Something about your words feels like I’ve been in your shoes. I’m praying for all the best on your journey to getting to exactly where you wish to be. ❤️
I know I comment on like everything you ever post, but it’s only because I relate to so much of what you write lololol just as I related to this piece! Love it so much! I went through this exact same thing. You articulated it so perfectly. I still deal with it but not quite to the degree that I did when I was in school. For me, it’s the worst in the morning, so going out to breakfast with friends tends to be a stressful event. I prefer to eat breakfast alone because of this.
I felt so so much of this though. I relate to your thought process and how you feel. Your writing has so often made me feel seen. Thanks so much for sharing and always being so honest <3
Girl same lol! I’m literally getting emotional, it makes me so happy to see that others relate to what I write (even though it means we’re all miserable lololol). Mornings can be bad for me too! I think the unpredictability of the day ahead/anticipating an event I have that day is what gets to me.
i've been trying to write a comment for about 10 minutes so please bear with me lol. For the majority of my undergrad, I experienced the same debilitating anxiety that absolutely destroyed my relationship to food, and for much of it I had felt very alone in my experience because like you said, it leads to profound isolation. I remember spending more time in the dining hall walking around trying to find something that looked like it wouldn't make me sick, only to feel queasy once it was in front of me on my plate. Instead of enjoying a meal with my friends, I was spending most of my meal times trying to quietly hype myself up to consume each bite. Now that I'm properly medicated and more on the recovered side from what I consider some kind of disordered eating, sharing food is so important to me and although I'm still not too big on going out to eat, I love making and sharing a meal with my close friends and family, or getting take out and watching a trashy film with my roommate.
thank you so much for your lovely comment! I never had the traditional college experience but there was one summer I went to camp for a week and I’d wake up with horrible anxiety every morning and could only manage some plain slices of toast. Which really pissed me off because my friends were eating delicious things like pancakes! I’d feel better by lunch time and eat like normal, just to start all over again the next day lol. Sometimes it definitely feels like disordered eating, or even just straight up eating disorders because my behaviors/coping mechanisms mirror ED symptoms, such as performing at meal times. My best friend and I have cooked for each other a few times when we have movie nights and it’s so nice! It’s definitely easier to eat at home but here’s to us both getting more comfortable with restaurants in the future xx
now that I've posted this, it seems like a bit much lol, but this piece hit really close to home for me. sending so much love and light to you ! thank you :)
wow this made me feel so incredibly seen and i’m so glad i stumbled upon this!! i’ve been struggling with the anxiety and emet cycle for a while now and it feels so isolating and it is so nice to be reminded that our suffering is never unique! we are never alone in it!! thank you for writing this <3
Thank you so much for reading and commenting! Seeing so many people relate makes me feel all fuzzy lol. Even though I knew logically that I couldn’t be the only one who felt this way, I felt like I was until I wrote this. I wish you luck in your journey, we all deserve to love food!
Mary! Thank you for articulating your tough experience so intricately for us. You’re a beautiful person for this and I truly empathised with every word. Food is such a core part of life and relationships and I never realised its depth until reading this piece of yours!! Something about your words feels like I’ve been in your shoes. I’m praying for all the best on your journey to getting to exactly where you wish to be. ❤️
thank you so so much for your lovely comment Sarah! this made my entire day lol!
I know I comment on like everything you ever post, but it’s only because I relate to so much of what you write lololol just as I related to this piece! Love it so much! I went through this exact same thing. You articulated it so perfectly. I still deal with it but not quite to the degree that I did when I was in school. For me, it’s the worst in the morning, so going out to breakfast with friends tends to be a stressful event. I prefer to eat breakfast alone because of this.
I felt so so much of this though. I relate to your thought process and how you feel. Your writing has so often made me feel seen. Thanks so much for sharing and always being so honest <3
Girl same lol! I’m literally getting emotional, it makes me so happy to see that others relate to what I write (even though it means we’re all miserable lololol). Mornings can be bad for me too! I think the unpredictability of the day ahead/anticipating an event I have that day is what gets to me.
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i've been trying to write a comment for about 10 minutes so please bear with me lol. For the majority of my undergrad, I experienced the same debilitating anxiety that absolutely destroyed my relationship to food, and for much of it I had felt very alone in my experience because like you said, it leads to profound isolation. I remember spending more time in the dining hall walking around trying to find something that looked like it wouldn't make me sick, only to feel queasy once it was in front of me on my plate. Instead of enjoying a meal with my friends, I was spending most of my meal times trying to quietly hype myself up to consume each bite. Now that I'm properly medicated and more on the recovered side from what I consider some kind of disordered eating, sharing food is so important to me and although I'm still not too big on going out to eat, I love making and sharing a meal with my close friends and family, or getting take out and watching a trashy film with my roommate.
thank you so much for your lovely comment! I never had the traditional college experience but there was one summer I went to camp for a week and I’d wake up with horrible anxiety every morning and could only manage some plain slices of toast. Which really pissed me off because my friends were eating delicious things like pancakes! I’d feel better by lunch time and eat like normal, just to start all over again the next day lol. Sometimes it definitely feels like disordered eating, or even just straight up eating disorders because my behaviors/coping mechanisms mirror ED symptoms, such as performing at meal times. My best friend and I have cooked for each other a few times when we have movie nights and it’s so nice! It’s definitely easier to eat at home but here’s to us both getting more comfortable with restaurants in the future xx
now that I've posted this, it seems like a bit much lol, but this piece hit really close to home for me. sending so much love and light to you ! thank you :)
I think I’m in love with your brain.
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thank you so much for your lovely comment 🫶🏻 I’m sorry you can relate but I’m happy it brought you some comfort!